A post-abortive person’s heart can be split – before and after the abortion. Every element of my life changed when my child died in that Indianapolis abortion clinic in 1981. Immediately I felt like no one could understand me. My vow that “no one would ever know” kept me a prisoner in my own heart.

How does one find fellowship and support when they cannot share what they’ve done? Abortion pain is a desolate torment due to the unusual need for secrecy. Abortion providers outline that one in three American women have chosen abortion. If this choice is so common, why does no one ever discuss it?

One reasons for this silence is the driving need to forget that the abortion ever happened. Abortion-vulnerable women often state, “Abortion means no one will know I was pregnant. I can forget it ever happened.”

Abortion PTSD can make forgetting an abortion impossible. For eleven years I felt like I was the only one that had ever chosen abortion. I told all my friends my pregnancy test was negative and even celebrated with a few as they were relieved. Only my boyfriend knew my truth and he was adamant abortion was my ONLY choice.

Because post-abortive people hide their abortion pain, they also isolate from abortion information that can provide encouragement and hope. Hearing another person’s abortion story is a great way to begin to crack open prison doors and help us address this choice.

If you are realizing emotional and spiritual pain due to your abortion, know that you are not alone. One-third of all women around you share this choice even though they are silent. Your heartache can be addressed and healed and the Ramah team, as well as this healing website, are here to help you navigate through each emotion. The fellowship of other post-abortive people can be a real balm in helping to remove this agony and come to peace.