Session Six: Grieving Your Loss
Embracing grief after abortion has massive rewards that are outlined in Psalm 126:4-6 NIV – Restore our fortunes, Lord, like streams in the Negev.Those who sow with tears will reap with songs of joy.Those who go out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with them.
Grief and joy don’t seem to go together but they do! I never want to “get over” missing my aborted child or my parents, who are now in heaven. Thinking about them can make me cry or laugh depending on the memory. When expected grief comes, like on their birthdays, anniversary dates or just looking through photos, I can weep again. I miss them.Crying brings God’s comfort close to my heart. By embracing this grief, I relieve my burden and receive God’s warm love.
Focused grief means openly embracing any level of potential sorrow and allowing tears to flow freely when they arrive. Whatever triggers abortion grief, realize tears are essential in the ongoing healing process.
Lamentations 2:18-19 shares more on God’s purpose in our mourning our aborted children – The hearts of the people cry out to the Lord. You walls of the Daughter of Zion, let your tears flow like a river day and night; give yourself no relief, your eyes no rest. Arise, cry out in the night, as the watches of the night begin; pour out your heart like water in the presence of the Lord. Lift up your hands to him for the lives of your children…
This session will help you begin to realize your grief and begin to embrace it so that you reach the joy that awaits you when God’s restoration process in your life is complete!
Abortion results in death. When women exit the abortion clinic, one is dead and another is wounded. Since abortion is a choice, society rarely allows post-abortive women the right or support to grieve their aborted child.
Emotions relating to grief are not right or wrong, good or bad. Many times they are not even coherent. There is no perfect way to grieve. There is only your way, and you must discover that way for yourself.
While abortion is a death experience, rarely do post-abortive people give themselves permission to grieve. Since we made the choice to reject parenthood, we often falsely believe we don’t need to grieve.
Abortion clearly involves giving birth. It obviously involves the loss of a child. However you view the abortion issue, there is no denying that this form of voluntary child loss has a physical impact on the women that choose it.
I never realized that His plan for my life included facing this deep trauma from my past. The pain wasn’t His punishment but simply a consequence of my abortion choice. Addressing the grief would help me heal.
In those early days of my abortion recovery class I couldn’t thank God for the process He was accomplishing in my heart. When the pain was intense I’d get angry at Him for putting me through such turmoil.
Everyone knows regret changes over time and comes in various shapes and sizes making it difficult to outline in a survey format. It also impacts hearts at many points of life experiences.
Every holiday season is filled with reminiscences of celebrations with family and friends, many of whom have gone ahead of us to Heaven. The Christmas story of Christ’s birth to a teenage mother can trigger unresolved abortion pain.
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Sydna Massé compassionately leads you on the difficult journey through denial, anger, and grief, to forgiveness, redemption, and letting go. Her Choice to Heal offers a road map to healing – practical suggestions, resources for help, space to journal, with the encouragement and hope.
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